Missing In Action

Well hey, hi ! it's been a while. Yes I've been missing in action and since my last menial post in 2007 a shit load has happened in my life. The 4 biggest things being in this particular order ...
1. Had a baby girl called Sophia on the 3rd of July 2009
2. Got pregnant AGAIN ! (holy crap)
3. Moved back to Australia
4. Had baby number two Evelyn on the 22nd of Sept 2010

So there you have it. I've been so busy doing possibly the hardest job in the world and I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. I think I'm doing an ok job - I guess only time will tell and I can only hope that I don't pass on too many psychological defects to my two beautiful girls. I suppose I turned out ok .. .. .. all things considered. You haven't met my parents, there is plenty of crazy that could have been passed on to me trust me, so I'm just filtering it down to my girls.

It's been such a long time since I have put pen to paper and to be completely honest I haven't had the time, energy or the inclination to write. The muse has clean gone and left me, sleep deprivation may have something to do with it and the complete lack of a life - I don't think nappy changing, breast feeding, baby sick and more nappy changing constitutes a life do you? They say it doesn't last forever, but when your in the middle of it, it feels like an eternity. Don't get me wrong I love my two girls, wouldn't have it any other way but there are days, no weeks when I feel like absolute crap and leaving the house is just not an option due to the crappiness that I feel.

This is just a brief post at this stage, just to let you know that yes I am still alive and kicking and I have plenty to write about.

peace out y'all xx

Merry Christmas

Hi - I would like to say a bit Thank You to everyone who has commented recently. Thanks for all your words of comfort and support, I really appreciate it. At the moment I am feeling a tad bit low, but hopefully the future is bright for Sakura Girl - ready to take on the world !!

I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas and I do sincerely hope you all have some banging hangovers come New Years.

Bye !

Bright side?

redundant
• adjective 1 not or no longer needed or useful; superfluous. 2 chiefly Brit. made unemployed because one’s job is superfluous to requirements.
Last Friday this is what happened to me.

I was advised that even though I am fantastic at my job, intelligent, management material etc etc that there was no longer a position for me on the West Coast. One could say that this was a massive kick in the guts, and that no matter what was said to me, after those words were uttered it was nothing but cold comfort.

Everyone keeps saying to me that I should not take it personally, that it was nothing that I have done that it is purely down to money; however that does not make me feel any better. When you are told that you are no longer needed that your position is no longer viable or necessary to the company you feel, well how should I put this … … … … like shit.

The great cogs and mechanisms of business have chewed me up and spat me out right in the middle of a shitty little town that is possibly so miserable at the moment I don’t even want to get out of bed in the mornings.

So forgive me if I am not in the most festive of moods at the moment. I am currently in my “down” mood. I have gone through a few since I was told, there is the “resigned to my own fate” mood, the “angry” mood and at the moment the “depressed, life and god hates me” mood.

The hardest thing that I had to do was call my parents and tell them the news, because I didn’t want to disappoint them. Thankfully it was me that was crying on the phone and not them, they took it surprisingly well – however there was the “you should come back to Australia, now there are so many jobs here for you” which I am sure there are. The G-man and I would have no problems getting work back home – we have a plan don’t worry and we are working on it. It’s all a bit hush hush at the moment but it does include taking over the world so watch this space.

I suppose it isn’t all that bad, I now have ample time to pursue my singing career, enter on to the X-Factor or Big Brother become a Z-list star by doing absolutely nothing and walk around with a poodle in my over-sized Louis Vuitton handbag. Now that sounds like a brilliant plan don’t you think?

OR and I know it isn’t half as glamorous but, I could focus on renovating our apartment in order to move on to phase 2 of get the fuck out of here (oh did I say that out loud?).

The other shit thing about it is that I will no longer have access to the internet on such a regular basis, i.e all the time! I will have to venture to the library and pray to god that I don’t get busted looking at boobies which happen to always appear on Phishez blog or read about lurid antics on Steph’s blog. So if I don’t comment at much on your blog it isn’t because I don’t love them anymore, it is probably because the crazy librarian has banned me for looking at porn! I tell ya! It is a crazy mixed up world.

So seeing as it is nearly lunch … … no hang on it is lunch time, I better change out of my pyjamas and do something constructive.

See you later peeps!

Conversations of a Boss Kind

Last week the G-man was sent up to Orkney for work. Begrudgingly the G-man packed his bags and drove 7 hours to nearly the arse end of Scotland, nearly the arse end but close enough. Having suffered from the worst bout of food poisoning only a couple of weeks ago, the G-man was not impressed at this prospect, however it seems one conversation between himself and his boss made it kind of worthwhile (to me anyway. It was hilarious, but maybe that was because I was drunk when the G-man told me what had transpired)…

Bring bring, bring bring

G-man: Boss, what can I do for you?

Boss: Oh hi G-man, umm I was just wondering? Umm, where are you because I was worried that I haven’t seen you around and thought you might be ill again.

G-man: perplexed Ummm I’m in Ornkey Boss? You know, you sent me here?

Boss: Oh right! Oh good that’s great.

G-man: Riiiight

Long pause

Boss: So you’re going to make it back for Saturday right because you don’t want to miss York’s and Jordy’s party.

G-man: Noooo, I’ll be back

Boss: Good, that’s great.

G-man: Riiiight

Boss: So, this 25th wedding anniversary thing, umm what’s that mean?

G-man: What?

Boss: Well what are you meant to get them as a present, like a mixer or microwave or something?

G-man: It’s a silver wedding anniversary so you’re meant to get them something silver but I don’t think it really matters they’re just having a party. I don’t think they’re gonna need a mixer, I think they might already have that.

Boss: Oh right. Ok, great.

Long pause

Boss: So …. G-man what are you wearing?

G-man: stunned silence What? Now? Umm I don’t think that’s appropriate do you?

Boss: stunned silence What? Silence again No! I mean for Saturday night are you wearing a suit?

Now if that had of been me, I would have said something like this…

Right now? Well I’m glad you asked. I’m wearing suspenders and a bustier, and a whip but you don’t count that as clothing and I am not sure about the lard that is smeared all over my body.

G-man: You know me Boss, I didn’t even wear a tie to my own wedding so a suit is out of the question.

Boss: Oh good ! Ok well I’ll see you later.

G-man: Right, bye.

The Winds of Change

Well done Ruddsy you've done well.

I got a phone call at 7:30am on Saturday morning from my parentals in Australia to let me know the good news, apparently people in their street were letting off fireworks ! I thought that was a bit extravagant don't you? Oh well any excuse for a piss up.

On another note I have been tagged by the ianandan expedition with a lovely little '8 things' meme so here we go...

8 things I am passionate about:

good food
writing
equality
my husband
music
singing (badly mind you)
art
family

8 things I want to do before I die:

snowboard
have children
learn more languages
learn to paint
move back to Australia
run a half marathon
travel more
find peace

8 things I say often:

"no way!"
"Oh Aye" - (slap me right now)
"Bastardi"
"errors"
"have you seen where I put ....."
"I don't understand"
"this place is chav central"
"beer? yes please"

8 books I have recently read:

Going Postal - Terry Pratchett
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - JK Rowling
Monstrous Regiment - Terry Pratchett
Night Watch - Terry Pratchett
Guards Guards - Terry Pratchett
Ok I think you are getting the picture now aren't you??

8 songs I could listen to over and over:

Best of You - Foo Fighters
Gli ostacali del cuore - Elisa
If you wear that velvet dress - U2
Don't Dream its over - Crowded House
Blue Sky Mining - Midnight Oil
I Choose You - Bindi Blatcher
Dancefloor - Stylophonics
One More Time - Daft Punk

8 things that attract me to my friends:

crazy
they make me laugh
they love a good rant
keep me grounded
smart
teach me things
they offer me support
they accept me

Little Johnny Howard

The G-man and I got our ballot papers in the mail on Friday !! Yehaaaaaaaaaaa and we took great pride in putting Little Johnny Howard where he belongs. We proudly sealed our votes and posted them straight back the Australian High Commission as soon as possible.

You're going down Johnny Tennis Shoes You're Going Down !

On another note, what is with the strange parties now? I was seriously tempted to vote for Senator on-line!! Is that some strange virtual politician or something? Wouldn't really make that much of a difference really.Or What Women Want Australia? You know what I want? I want John Howard to get the fuck out of here. There were a few other strange ones as well, something about climate change and oh yeah the Australian Shooters Party - now that's a goer.

You know, it is also good to see that One Nation is still kicking about - the racist bell ends, because for a moment there I thought that we only had the Liberal party to push the anti-Aboriginal, anti-homosexual anti-bloody-everything policies in our Government.

You know what they say about Little Johnny Tennis Shoes - he's only patting you on the back to find the best place to stab you.

Makes me smile